Manage Criticism: Reframe for Success
Whatever you’re trying to achieve – save the world, write a novel, or championing a particular cause – there are likely to be those who will be critical. Some people just have a critical disposition while others will take issue with the specifics of your endeavour. Criticism is unavoidable. However, how we choose to manage criticism and reframe it is entirely within our control.
Try these effective strategies to manage criticism and reframe for success
Clarify your purpose
At the core of our being lies the quest for meaning. Making meaning for ourselves – and value for others – is fundamental to a life well lived. When our pursuits align with our deepest values and aspirations, we care far less about the criticisms of others. If they can easily throw you off your path, you might want to reflect on how important it really is to you. Reflect on the significance of your endeavours and on how they resonate with your core values. Are your actions and ambitions consistent with your values?
Understand the critic’s motivation
Dig deep into why critics criticise. Are they projecting themselves in to the situation – their aspirations, their skill set, their propensity for risk, their values? Are they genuinely trying to protect you from any potential down-sides? Are they trying to maintain the status quo – for you, them, or both? Are they masking their own lack of action?
Recognise that criticism is not balanced appraisal
We have evolved to notice negative issues more readily than positive ones. We are more likely to notice criticism than encouragement: people working against us over people supporting us. Understand that most people are indifferent to your journey, and criticism often stems from their own biases and limitations. So, get on with your life and enjoy it!
Accept that criticism is inevitable
Whether you become a billionaire, movie star, teacher, doctor, or sit on the couch all day, there is someone that will tell you that you’re doing the wrong thing. So, live your life building towards what you do want rather than away from what the critics don’t want.
Respond calmly
Rather than giving your critics the pleasure of an emotional response, respond with composure and reframe their position. Acknowledge any valid points raised and the leaps of faith you are making.
Use your critics as motivation
While some people are intimidated and deflated by the critics of the world, others are able to use the negative comments as a source of motivation. Re-frame negative feedback into fuel for progress. Remind yourself that while the critics are standing on the side-lines, you are on the pitch and playing the game.
Decide if they have something useful to say
Some criticism may carry valid points – explore these with your critic and ask what their solution would be – the response differentiates between useful and harmful dialogue. If the criticism isn’t useful, move on. Don’t you have more important things to do?
Manage criticism as a compliment
Most people will leave you alone if you’re struggling or aren’t doing anything noteworthy. You only become a significant target of negative comments if you’re doing well. If you’re taking a lot of heat, you must be doing something correct!
Live authentically
Live your own life, by your own values. Craft your life to use your signature strengths to create meaning for you, value for others and legacy for the future in your chosen pursuit.
The author, Kevin Whitelaw, is an accredited Solution Focused Hypnotherapist who helps adults across the globe become their best selves. He can be found here: A little about me
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